|Look at how healthy my hair looks!|
Well the beauty of transitioning is that you have this time to mentally rewire your thoughts. I have been reading a blog Slimwavy and Jazz Wife (whom I consider a friend) and I have been engaged in several dialogues lately about how beauty is tied so much to our thoughts and not based on logic and healthy practices. Basically, I had to convince myself that I was beautiful and that my beauty is not defined by long flowing straight damaged hair that broke off every time I brushed it, washed it, and or simply touched it. My transitioning and these past several months post my Big Chop have forced me to learn to care for my hair and to build self confidence in myself by shedding old myths I took as gospel truth. The reason why this was hard for me was because I was told by many love ones (not my husband) that beauty was to NOT have nappy hair. I was told over and over again that I was pretty with that damaged relaxed hair, so I thought that was what I had to do to be beautiful.
I transitioned without the aid of a wig, weave, braids, and or extensions. I did it the old fashioned way. I grew out my hair until I got tired of the two textures and made an appointment to cut it all off five months after my last relaxer. I told myself that it's just hair and that it would eventually grow back. Why was I hanging onto something I planned to cut off anyway? Basically, I had to convince myself to let go of something that was bad for me, but it was familiar and it had been with me for so long I didn't know how to live without it. It was like asking a smoker to simply quit and even without the addiction of the nicotine you have to learn new habits, you have to change your thinking. That's what my transition was like and especially wearing my TWA. My TWA forced me to learn so much about my hair and who I am. There's no hiding when you wear a TWA! A TWA is a commitment. A statement to the world. For me wearing my TWA was the best way to break free from everything that I thought was beautiful and reshape my thoughts by embracing who I have always been, but hid with a bad habit for decades.
|I had to get a picture of the pin in my hair.|